Hey bby. I’m back. Ya miss me?
I took a bit of a hiatus on Heels In My Backpack over the last 6 months. It wasn’t pre-planned. I just didn’t feel like writing anymore. I forced myself to write my annual birthday post, just for tradition’s sake, and it didn’t come easy at all. I was just like, who exactly am I writing this for? Why am I doing this? And then whaddya know, I turned around and half a year had passed since I wrote anything of use.
I think this is down to a couple of things.
Firstly, I’m bloody busy. My life is full. In all the best ways though.
I have a 3 year old daughter whom my world revolves around and my spare time is dominated by park trips and football practice and playdates and Bluey (aka the best TV show ever). I make time for date nights with Josh and seeing my friends, and occasionally go to a Zumba class at the gym. I’m planning my wedding, which as it happens is occurring in just 3 months time – eek! And oh yeah, I have a full time job, which doesn’t really leave me with any time leftover. So blogging has well and truly found itself at the bottom of the pile. (Well, it’s above chores, but let’s not discuss the state of my house…)
I’ve not made myself feel bad about it though (which I would have a few years ago). Because all of those things are more important to me. And if I do have any time to myself, I give it to myself. I rest. I read. I watch terrible reality TV. I even joined a monthly art class. Life is good.
But honestly I don’t think not having time is the main reason for the hiatus. It’s true, I’m time-poor these days, but I’ve always been a believer that you make time for things most important to you.
The thing is, I needed a break from the blog hustle.
I’ve been writing this blog for ten years. Read that again, TEN YEARS. And over that time my attitude and approach to Heels In My Backpack has changed considerably. It started as a way to help people not make the travel mistakes I did. It evolved into somewhere I would document my life at the same time, just for me. And then my Instagram page blew up and I started taking it quite seriously. I would go to travel blogging events, work with brands, get free shit, go on press trips, get offered free holidays and hotel stays, meet up with other people in this blogging/influencer world. It was a second job.
Don’t get me wrong, it can be very rewarding. My friends and family would be impressed with me scoring a free road trip across the USA, or a free cruise, or being paid to go to festivals. It was quite a cool way to spend my late twenties I won’t lie. But none of this stuff is actually free. It involves a lot of hard work and long days and means that you never feel like you’re actually ever on holiday when you’re on holiday.
I know, boo hoo, it’s hard having free trips lol. But it’s more about the mindset it put me in. You start getting stressed about how many likes a photo gets on Insta because it will directly impact whether or not a brand will work with you again. You get caught up on how often you “should be” posting on your socials or on your blog. You google things like “How do you know if you’ve been shadow banned?” or “Trending audio for Reels”. And that’s really not how I want to live my life.
It’s a weird world. And this wasn’t even my main source of income. I don’t know how anyone else does it.
So I spent a lot of the last couple of years analysing exactly what I wanted from this space. What I wanted to use it for. If I go back to my original reason for starting it, it doesn’t matter how often I post. It’s about sharing tips and knowledge that will help other people. It’s about documenting my life so I can look back on it. That’s it. It doesn’t matter about likes or followers or frequency of content.
It meant I didn’t feel like I HAD to post anything. If I wasn’t doing anything I wanted to tell people about, I didn’t write about it. I’ve not worked with brands for a while out of choice – I’ve had offers but I never really felt like getting a free backpack was worth a few hours of photographing and writing. And like I said, I didn’t exactly have time for it.
Did I consider stopping blogging altogether? Absolutely. It doesn’t feel as big of a part of my identity anymore. I don’t feel like I need any validation from it. But ultimately, I like writing. And so I’ll keep doing it for a while longer. But only on my own terms.
I’ll catch up on my recent trips soon, but I just wanted to check in and tell you where I’ve landed. I’ll still write about travel, when I want to. I’ll still write about motherhood and my life, when I want to. I’m still here. Just with zero pressure or need to churn out blog posts unnecessarily.
See ya when I see ya. X
